


Fade away (Translation)

by GrimmjowKurosaki19



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Amazing Spider-Man (Movies - Webb)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Tragedy, Bisexuality, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Gen, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M, Sick Harry, Smoking, Songfic, Translation, Xenophilia, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-10
Updated: 2014-11-10
Packaged: 2018-02-24 19:08:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2592929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrimmjowKurosaki19/pseuds/GrimmjowKurosaki19
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If he played well his cards that day, Peter wouldn’t know how the disease not only hadn’t healed, but had also been spread at an alarmingly fast speed.<br/>During the film The Amazing Spiderman 2, Harry asks Spiderman for only one thing. For him to lie to Peter, to tell him that he had gave him his blood. To assure him that Harry would live.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fade away (Translation)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Afuri](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Afuri/gifts).
  * A translation of [Fade away](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2478314) by [GrimmjowKurosaki19](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrimmjowKurosaki19/pseuds/GrimmjowKurosaki19). 



> Warnings: This is probably the worst translation in the history of bads translations but I did it so this monster is out of the cage now.

_** “I'm cold and broken  ** _ **_  
_It's over I didn't want to see it come to this”_ _ **

_**** _

Spiderman wouldn’t help, of course he wouldn’t, a blood sample was all that was needed for everyone to discover his secret identity. He imagined that all the people behind the secret identity of the man in front of him were more important to him than the life of a single pretentious kid demanding his blood.

But he wanted to live, he wanted to live as much as any other person on the planet and for a moment, for a moment he thought of screaming , of crying, and of throwing his expensive glass of scotch right in his face, he wanted to tell him that he was a fraud and to get drunk until he couldn’t remember his own name.

He did not.

"Okay," he said, "...just do this for me ... take it, I don't know, as a last favor before I die" he smiled bitterly drinking every drop of alcohol in the glass. "If Peter asks of what’d you told me... no, when Peter asks of what’d you told me... I want you to lie, to tell him you gave me the blood, to tell him that my scientists are working on a cure, and to tell him that there is hope"

"Harry ..." whispered Spiderman and for a moment he seemed genuinely affected by his pain, Harry could not imagine what kind of emotions crossed the face of the masked man at the time, nor did he care, at that precise instant all he wanted was to be alone, alone with his own emotions, alone with his horrible and imminent death.

He wanted to be the damn selfish child who everyone thought he was, he wanted to be alone.

Alone to curl up on his too expensive couch and drink himself to sleep or to pass out of an ethylic attack, whatever happened first.

"No!" He cried, slamming the empty glass on the floor. "No ..." he whispered to himself, "get out of here, get out of here and when Peter asks of what’d you told me, you tell him that all is well, tell him you gave me your blood. Lie to him, tell him I'll live. Tell him..."

 

_"That there is hope"_

 

"Harry you're going to live ... I'm sure ..."

"It's not me you have to lie to, _Spiderman_ " He interjected acerbically, slowly moving towards the leather couch in which he had been sleeping until a few minutes ago, curling up on it, with his back to the man that his friend had called a hero "And I think you have to go" he finished closing his eyes.

_He waited a moment until he heard the air sliding characteristic of the graceful movements of Spiderman and only when he could no longer feel the oppressive presence of the other man in the room he allowed himself to mourn into sleep._

_** “I wonder if I will ever see your face again. ** _ **_  
_And I know that I will find a way to shed my skin”_ _ **

_**** _

The dark, green scarf looked lovely against his pale skin, the too large coat hid well both pieces of dead skin on his right wrist as how he had lost too much weight in less than three weeks, a little well applied makeup concealed the unhealthy pallor of his face along to some of the disease that had spread to his left cheekbone.

If he played well his cards that day, Peter wouldn’t know how the disease not only hadn’t healed, but had also been spread at an alarmingly fast speed if the illness of his father was anything close to a record to follow. His father had no physical signs of the disease until about his 30 years and he still did not fulfill 25.

Harry knew that in his case it wasn’t only the sick genetics of the Osborns that were giving him problems but the weak genes from his mother as well. If he didn’t miscalculated he wouldn’t have the 20-years-or-so of decent health that Norman had enjoyed before he died. If he did not miscalculated he wouldn't reach his own 30s. It wasn’t a good outcome.

Walking away from the mirror in the bathroom, he walked to his room where his Smartphone was resting on the center of his bed, scrolling, he found two new messages.

_One of Felicia:_

**_Meeting with the board of executives_ **

**_Tomorrow 16:35 PM._ **

**_Don't be late._ **

****

_Harry smiled at it, and at the way Felicia seemed to be his boss rather than his assistant most of the time. She was one of the few people alive who knew about his disease and she had taken his physical and emotional care as an important part of her work as his personal assistant. In the past two weeks she had scheduled two appointments with a discreet doctor to take care of the most basic parts of the disease, such as weakness and weight loss. He had found a great friend in the former assistant of his father and almost resented the way Norman had never given her much credit or had never treated her as anything more than just a decently attractive secretary, he would not follow Norman’s same mistakes. Felicia was going to be part of his will, one that he knew, would need sooner than later._

_Another of Peter:_

**Hey! I just wanted to check**

**If tonight was still standing.**

**If you don't feel well we can always**

**Postpone it for another day**.

 

Harry frowned, in fact he hadn't felt well that morning, when he had risen and tried to take a cold shower to relieve the hangover that was already a common occurrence in his life, the water had felt like a million knives sharpened against his exposed skin, he knew that the disease was making his skin weaker, he was no stranger to the cold water to kill the affects of alcohol.

Then, when he had tried to have breakfast he had failed to keep anything.

In any case, he wouldn’t let Peter find out about these little episodes, no if he hoped to keep his little charade for long, Peter didn't have to know anything.

 

_He sent a small answer:_

**_Of course it is you idiot._ **

**_Today at 20:00 do not make me wait._ **

****

****

_** “It's simple I know that I will suffer in the end” ** _

_**** _

_**** _

That night was particularly awful, almost two months after the rejection of Spiderman the tremors had become habitual and he had begun to feel intense pain around his entire body regularly, digest or just keep food had become almost impossible, take showers was completely out of the question, in those days he could only bathe in the tub and even when it was not desagreable rather than very enjoyable, it was a constant reminder of how his body was deteriorating gradually, he wondered how his father had managed to reach forty, it was a stupid question considering the weak genes from his mother, alongside with his smoking and alcoholism.

That night he had agreed to meet with Peter at a Korean restaurant that Gwen frequented before moving to England, they had a pretty nice dinner. Harry eating as little as possible and Peter pretending not to notice the thinness of his friend.

 

The problem came when the night ended.

Peter had wanted to accompany him to his apartment, they walked side by side, taking small, easy conversations and throwing little verbal jabs to each other’s when it happened.

It began as a coughing attack, Peter stood by his side without knowing what to do, worry and something indecipherable labeled on his face as Harry coughed between difficult breaths, holding his mouth in his hands in an almost instinctive act, at some point his legs gave out.

 

About two minutes later the coughing stopped, around them was formed a group of people between concerned and curious, to his side and squatted Peter was stroking small circles on his back not knowing what else to do to help his sick friend. Then when Harry had given himself the strength to remove his hands from his mouth he could hear the gasp of consternation coming from Peter at seeing them stained with blood.

 

"Harry ..." he whispered cautiously.

 

"It's okay Pete ... everything is fine" He interrupted taking a handkerchief from his pocket to clean his hands. "Now help me up"

 

"Harry ... you said you were taking a temporary medication with the blood of Spiderman" he inquired as he held Harry's waist to help him up.

 

"And it's true, but it is just that, temporary, it's fine my scientists are working on a cure, everything will be fine," he replied wrapping an arm around Peter's shoulders. "I'm Harry Osborn, I have the best scientists that money can buy working with the blood of Spiderman" he said smiling. "Now take me home, I have a meeting tomorrow"

 

"Harry I don't believe ..." He tried to dissuade him.

 

"Shush" Harry silenced him by placing a finger against his lips, "I'm fine," he said looking at his feet for a few seconds before lifting his head suddenly staring at the sky, Peter's arms around his shoulders. "God I cannot believe I fell on the floor this is an Armani suit for God's sakes!"

 

They walked to his apartment, Peter insisted on staying for the night, but he refused with some lame excuse about privacy and not wanting to be overprotected. Eventually Peter left with the same expression of concern and something indecipherable and too close to guilt crossing his features.

 

“Fast I fade away   
It's almost over   
Hold on”

**__ **

Five months later, Harry tried to access one of his bank accounts but failed, when he phoned Felicia she accessed easily, the password was the same, but he could not remember it.

A few checks told him that although there was not much brain damage the disease would end deteriorating his brain as well as the rest of his body.

 

He called Aunt May two days later. Peter would not know it and he expected her to be more objective about what he wanted to do.

 

He tried to make a reservation at the cheapest but discreet restaurant he could find in New York, he knew that she would hate to have to spend too much time in a place in where she would definitely feel out of place and he wanted her to feel as comfortable as possible in an environment that wouldn't end in the newspapers because Harry Osborn was eating in a place too cheap for his luxury living.

 

"Oh Harry!" She said hugging him a bit too strong "Look at you," she pointed, holding and spreading his hands "You're quite a little man"

 

"Hi Aunt May" He greeted shyly holding her chair "is good to see you," he added sitting opposite her. Two waiters came seconds later, one with two plates of pasta and another with a bottle of wine.

 

"Harry you shouldn't have bothered " chided.

 

"It's not a bother"

 

"Okay, I'll let it go if you promise to visit me so I can cook you one of those plates of pancakes that you love so much"

 

He smiled. "Of course"

 

They ate in comfortable silence until two different waiters took the dishes away and brought two expensive-looking desserts, then it was Aunt May who broke the silence.

 

"Harry? What's happening?" She asked with that expression of motherly love and concern that Harry had loved for most of his childhood.

 

"Aunt May ..."

 

"Do not try to lie to me young man, you may be better than Peter lying but a mother always knows when someone's is lying to her"

 

Harry sighed, "I'm dying"

 

He had no time to say anything before hearing the squeak of the chair in front of him and then feel thin but strong, warm arms around his neck . "Oh Harry my boy," she whispered tearfully, Harry took a deep breath before pushing her away gently. She sat in her seat.

 

"It's okay Aunt May. I ... had time to get used to the idea, it's terminal, genetic, dad died of the same thing, but ... if my calculations are right ... I have no more than three years four or five if I have luck, maybe eight "She gasped placing her hands in her mouth, thick tears running down her cheeks, He rose from his chair to clean them and then take the moderately wrinkled hands between his own a little too thin and with the tips of the fingers yellow for the cigarettes.

 

"The important thing is ... my will, Aunt May ... I want you to know that I have never thought that you wanted me for my money, and I know that you love me and loved me unconditionally, I also know that none of you two would know what to do with all my money, that is why I will only leave you a small part of it, enough for you and Peter to live a quiet life, and for Peter to pay his collage "Aunt May seemed to protest, too proud to receive his money, but he interrupted her .

 

"Aunt May, you and Peter have given me the best years of my life and even if I know that that everything you gave me was for free and all the love you gave me cannot be paid with money, I want this, I want to die knowing that the people I love will live well. Please," he asked, bursting into tears.

 

She clenched his hands, a sad smile as her only sign of agreement.

 

He paid the bill and they walked arm in arm to the exit, finally facing the car that he hired to bring Aunt May back home, he kissed her cheek and held the wrists of closest person he ever had to a mother.

 

"Aunt May please do not tell Peter nothing of what happened here, he doesn’t know what's happening, he believes I have the cure, let him have hope ... for a while"

 

**__ **

“Slow I suffocate   
I'm cold and broken   
Alone”

 

Harry took a deep drag of the imported cigarette that he had chosen this week as his new poison, French or English, he really could not tell the difference, he could not tell the difference of far too much things lately.

 

Sitting on the balcony of his apartment, a single sheet around his naked body, he fixed his gaze on the starless sky under the lights of Manhattan, anyone could say that the nights in Bombay or under the sky of Brazil were a sight far more appellative, far more beautiful, more natural, he had traveled enough to make his opinion on the topic valid. But those days he had no opinions about pretty much anything.

 

Exhaling the contaminated smoke he could feel the protest of his lungs, he didn't give it much thought.

 

He was going to die anyway.

 

In his bed, the boy he had picked up at a bar to have some quick sex without commitments was sleeping peacefully. Etienne or Claude or something of the like, he had not had problems with his skin and he had kissed him in every place wounded by the disease, a little too intimate, a little too full of love for one night of pure sex.

 

 

It had been wonderful. It had been everything that many people seek in sex; pleasurable, intimate, a perfect mix between selfishness and concern, between pain and pleasure.

 

He hadn't felt anything.

 

His body was there as it always was, but his mind was elsewhere, his mind was between the nights of dinners a little too cheap for his taste and ridiculously tourist attractions that he and Peter wouldn't dare calling dates, it was among strong verbal jabs to each other’s and small bumps on the shoulders, between bad photos taken with professional cameras.

 

It was where it had been for the last eight years of his life and where it was going to stay for the maybe five or six years he had left.

 

"You're smoking" He could hear the flash in the air before he heard the voice muffled by the mask. Taking another deep exhale of cigar he cocked his head, to his side Spiderman was balanced on a net that seemed unable support his weight, but somehow, and miraculously, it did.

 

"Yes," He answered, smoke escaping his nostrils.

 

"You shouldn't, it's bad for your health" His voice sounded worried, his intonation implied reproach, and Harry wondered if Spiderman had the right to reproach.

 

"Oh please! I'm dying anyway!" He shouted, laughing bitterly.

 

"Harry please, you know I cannot give you my blood"

 

"Yes, yes, yes, YES!" He yelled! "I know! I know every damn excuse! What I don't it's what are you doing here! "He exploded, blowing out the cigarette against one of the pillars of the balcony.

 

"I saw you leaving the bar with a guy, wanted to be sure you were okay"

 

"Everything is fine, everything is amazing, I'm as good as five months ago when you left me to die, now could do it again and please let me alone!" He growled irritably.

 

"You know him?" He asked, trying to ignore the hatred and anger towards him.

 

"I know he likes Bourbon, that likes to bite your lips right after kissing them, I know he's not a natural blonde, I know he is European; Marie Belle or ... no, wait, those are girl's names" he chuckled to himself.

 

"Harry that cannot be safe ..."

 

"Safe? Whatever that tries to kill me will have to get in line behind this damn thing that's eating my body! "He shouted tearing the sheet over his body, exposing the small roads of almost cerulean skin breaking sick lines on his pale torso.

 

Spiderman gasped as he wrapped himself in the blanket again and walked into the apartment, "Now please go" He asked, his voice breaking on the last sentence.

 

Spiderman watched him for a moment, indecisive, before extending his hand and jump suspended by a spider web.

 

Harry got into bed, and Julien or Pierre embraced him from behind, strong arms around his waist.

 

 _He thought of Peter_.

 

 

**_ “It's hopeless, the end will come and wash it all away   
Forsaken, I live for those I lost along the way” _ **

**__ **

Two months after speaking with Aunt May Harry accidentally found his father's experiments in a -Mental asylum- called Ravencroft, it belonged to Osborn Industries and it was the same mental hospital where they had locked up a company electrician named Max who had suffered a serious accident a few months ago.

 

Menken had assured him that Max was being treated by the best doctors and his lawyers were responsible for providing compensation to Max Dillon in the best way possible. He had not worried about it and he had let it pass, too focused on his illness and his hatred, for well, everything in general.

 

He had chosen to believe that Max was in good hands.

 

Everything was a lie.

 

Max was being tortured, Max was being stripped of his humanity and he would not allow it.

 

There were three exhausting weeks of teamwork between him and Felicia, both working under the radar of Osborn Enterprises day and night, almost without sleep, seeking the greatest possible amount of incriminating evidence on Menken and the rest of the table of businessmen and lawyers of his father.

 

Finally, during the fourth week they were able to form a strong and solid demand for all involved, proving his innocence based on the dates of admission of patients and the date he became CEO of the company, none matched and even if the name Osborn was behind everything related to Ravencroft his name had never been appointed, unlike Menken's name, Norman's, many other scientists and the big positions in the table of Osborn's administrators.

 

Ravencroft's doors closed forever at the end of the month, on that day, he was there with the constant presence of Felicia, apologysing with all the affected patients and families and wishing well to everyone who would be released or transferred to more humane institutions, then he noticed that many children and adults that were admitted to Ravencroft were mutants, he requested Felicia to make the appropriate calls to move them all to Westchester.

 

He also arranged to send a monthly check to the Xavier School, in gratitude.

 

Then he met Max. Max was a pale figure restricted in what seemed a complex apparatus of torture, Harry could see the loneliness and hatred in his eyes and it was then that he made the decision.

"Hey" he greeted casually, hands in his pockets a mask of immature indifference hiding his aversion for the scene before him.

 

Max looked down, his pale eyes were fixed on him and him alone and Harry felt a chill run through his body.

 

"Who are you?" Asked him apathetic, his voice a metallic whisper, the sound of electric currents when ignited.

 

"Harry Osborn" He replied smiling, one of those smiles full of white teeth and narrowed eyes.

 

Powerlines traveled inside Max's brain, Harry stared fascinated by the brain connections exposed by the transparent skin. "I should kill you," he hissed, a rumbling growl that Harry could hear across the room.

 

"But you won't do it," He replied as a matter of fact.

 

"Why shouldn't I?"

 

"Because you're not a murderer Max, and because I am not who you want, I'm just a kid with the last name of one of the men who did this to you, you are a genius Max and I need you"

 

"You need. Me?" He asked hopefully. The entire facade of hatred suddenly become vulnerable.

 

"Yes Max I need you"

 

 

 **_ “And I can't remember how it all began to break.   
You suffer, I live to fight and die another day _ ** **** _ ” _

__

__

Gwen Stancy got engaged two years later with a Brit named Edward Krone, Harry appeared in Peter's and Aunt May's apartment with a bottle of too expensive Irish whiskey and a pack of German beers a day later.

 

Peter followed him to his apartment like a lost puppy, red eyes and wrinkled clothes.

 

They drank and laughed, sang and wept, Peter pretended not to see the green scars and protruding veins in Harry's skin as Harry pretended not to feel uncomfortable in the black sleeveless shirt exposing his neck affected by the disease and his cadaverous thinness.

 

The bottles were scattered on the floor in the middle of them, Peter sat cross-legged drinking from a beer bottle by a minimalist black leather couch and Harry smoked a cigar with brand that Peter could not even read half lying between the floor and the big white couch on which he used to sleep.

 

"You could go to the wedding" he suggested "She invited you" he said, taking a lazy drag of the cigar. Peter wondered if there was such thing as hands porn.

 

"Traveling all the way to England just to see the girl I love marry another ... yeah I don't believe I have the money to spend on something like that"

 

"Actually ... she invited me too, I'll go with Max, so ... you could always go with us ..." he insinuated, getting up and taking a glass and a bottle of Vodka of the pile on the floor, the cigarette still in his hands.

 

"Max? Dillon? You two are, you know ...?" Peter seemed to fight with his words, discomfort and liquor hindering him.

"Boyfriends? Lovers? "He asked laughing."No, nothing like that, Max works for me, as an advisor, as a consultant, ... he just took the job as a bodyguard as part of his work as a consultant, like Felicia took the babysitting job as part of his job as my assistant, you all believe I'm going to break if you leave me alone" he remarked exhaling smoke through his nostrils dramatically.

 

Peter avoided commenting about the latter "Yes" He said "I think I would like to go"

 

Harry smiled, one of those smiles that promised nothing good, but the best that anyone could imagine at the same time.

 

"England" he whispered offering him a glass of Vodka and extinguishing the cigarette. "I lost my virginity in England"

 

Peter sat in silence, Harry moved toward him, his blue eyes glassy with the alcohol and tobacco on his system. They looked at each others in aphony for a moment until Peter looked away, not knowing what to do with the air of awkwardness filling the room.

 

Harry sat beside him resting his head on Peter's shoulder.

 

"His name was Jack" He continued "He was twenty two. I was fifteen, I think he was in charge of showing the campus to the newbies in boarding school, I didn't even knew I liked guys back then" he laughed staring at the floor as it was the most amusing thing ever heard "Our age ... anyone could argue that I did not know what I was doing they would be  absolutely right anyway, I didn't even knew I needed lubrication, others might say he abused me, I was underage, but the truth is ... "Harry looked up and their eyes met" I enjoyed every _single_ second, "he said, savoring each word, his voice a lilting whisper, Peter stopped breathing.

 

_They kissed._

**__ **

“Fast I fade away   
It's almost over   
Hold on”

**__ **

****

They actually never did anything about the kiss, nor did a single comment on anything else that happened that night, Peter decided to blame the alcohol and Harry decided to afford it.

 

Surprisingly nothing became awkward between them.

 

Peter still loved Gwen and Harry wasn't willing to be second in anyone's life, not after being the second, third and fourth in his father's life throughout all his childhood and adolescence.

 

Life took its course, the disease seemed to have stopped in his back but Harry hadn't allowed himself to hold hope.

 

He kept using too large clothing and exclusive brands scarves in his neck, continued to cover his paleness with makeup and continued taking baths instead of showers.

 

Etienne became a constant in his bed. Spiderman became a constant in his life, jumping into his window from time to time, taking care of him when he needed it, only during the night.

 

Guilt, Harry assumed, it was devouring him from the inside out. Harry didn't even give it a second thought and surprised himself with not being angry at the thought.

 

Two months later, he, Peter and Max went to London.

 

Within the private business jet of Osborn industries, Max waited in his containment suit; austere, with an aura of power surrounding him like a second skin, nothing like the nervous man with a serious case of inferiority that Spiderman saved just over a year ago.

 

"Max, Pete, Pete, Max" Harry introduced moving betwen them in a rebuff of playfully elegance and youth that Peter had never seen on the lanky guy he used to know.

 

During the trip, Harry could feel the tension in the air, Peter's resentment at having to travel to see his former girlfriend marry someone else and Max's apprehension at sharing Harry with anyone but himself. Harry still wondered how he had managed to stop him from growling whenever him and Felicia were in the same room.

 

"So... England. Huh?" He began “You know, I like England, as everyone but ... it's so touristic! God! "He smiled, lighting a cigarette" And the boys! I mean, I like Englishmen who doesn't? All that elegance and good manners. "He exhaled smoke. "Anyway I prefer Brazil, the most beautiful women I've ever seen I swear" He looked at the ceiling of the plane, Peter seemed to have stopped being angry and had chosen to hear Harry's stories, Max, meanwhile could not help but observe his friend's babbles with a small smile creeping into his lipless mouth. "In Brazil women are gorgeous, amazonic beauty, in Brazil women don't appear to abide by the new standards of beauty, the models these days? Skin and bones, in Brazil women are allowed to have meat on they body..."

 

The trip suddenly lost all atmosphere of discomfort.

 

At the airport, Gwen was waiting with a man of moderately curly, almost ginger blond hair. Harry could imagine was what that she saw in him. Tall, strongly built, big green eyes and the type of smiles that make you want to smile with him.

 

Harry also noticed that, as they stood in the middle of the airport like everyone else. Many tourists stared at Max as if he were some kind circus act or a TV freak. All including Gwen's fiancé. Harry always made a point to behave as calm as possible around Max in public.

 

"This is Max" He said placing an arm around the bigger man in a warm embrace. "I'd say he is my bodyguard, but really he is just an overprotective bastard"

 

Max grumbled something too low to hear and everyone let it pass.

 

Peter greeted Gwen with a kiss on the cheek and a hug a little bit too intimate and Edward Gwen a handshake a little bit too strong, Harry greet Gwen with a wet kiss on the cheek and Edward with an equally wet kiss on the cheek.

 

"I love Englishmen" he smiled breaking the silence, everyone laughed. All except Max and Peter.

 

"Actually I'm Irish" Edward smiled.

 

"Oh whatever, I like them too"

 

 

 **_ “Slow I suffocate  _ **   
**I'm cold and broken  
Alone”**

**__ **

__

After the wedding, Peter danced Waltz with Gwen as Harry danced with Max. Holding his gloved hands firmly, beside them Edward danced with his mother, a lovely blond woman with little more than 45 year. Harry made a mental note to dance with her later.

 

At some point Harry saw Peter leave the room with Gwen, Harry knew that Peter had a particularly strong moral compass. He never could think of Peter as the type of man who would do anything inappropriate with the bride on her wedding day, but Harry also knew that Peter was still in love with Gwen.

 

It was a strange thing. For a man to be strongly in love with a woman even after two years of being away from her.

 

But then ... he was still in love with the same man even after 8 years of being away from him and two years of unrequited love.

 

_Love was a strange thing._

 

Harry followed them into a hallway's nearly deserted corner, always telling himself that he was doing it to prevent Peter from doing something stupid.

 

They were arguing, Gwen looked gorgeous, her normally jovial face framed in a mask of anger and disapproval, her delicate hands holding the ends of her dress tightly.

 

"Have you even told him who you are?" Harry heard her ask.

 

"Gwen," Peter said, holding his hands in hers tentatively. "You know I can't" he whispered "I can't put him in danger"

 

Harry frowned, seeing how Gwen's beautiful face contorted into an expression of bad-concealed anger. "In danger!" She laughed bitterly "He is dying Peter!"

 

Harry felt curiosity running through his back at knowing that they were talking about him.

 

"I know he's dying!" Cried Peter, "And I don't know what to do with it and it's _killing_ me inside!" He hissed, "Because there's nothing I can do without losing him again"

 

Gwen's features softened with that. Harry feared understand the course of the conversation.

 

"At least you can save him" she whispered motherly "If the blood of Spiderman is the cure then give it to him, you're a genius, I'm a genius, Harry is a genius educated in the best schools money can buy, if your blood is the cure and dangerous then we can make it to stop being dangerous "She assured him.

 

Harry couldn't think of much else. At that time his mind was dancing in one sentence. "If your blood is the cure" -If your blood is the cure- Spiderman's blood was the blood pumping through the veins of his best friend.

 

Peter Parker was Spiderman.

 

"He's going to hate me" he heard Peter say "He already thinks Spiderman let him die" Harry heard his voice breaking. "I don't want to lose him Gwen"

 

Peter was crying.

 

Gwen stared at him.

 

God Gwen was staring at _him_ , mouth open, guilt in her eyes.

 

From one moment to another Peter turned around, following with his eyes whatever was distracting Gwen, his brown eyes filled with tears, horror and guilt met with Harry's equally horrified light blue eyes.

 

Harry left England with Max that day. Peter left the city two days after him on one of the company planes.

 

 **_ Fast I fade away  _ **   
**It's almost over  
Hold on**

**__ **

**__ **

Peter tried to ask his forgiveness. Peter gave him his blood. Peter promised to work in his laboratory until the last day of his life to save him.

 

The day that Peter showed up at his window as Spiderman. Max tried to assassinate him. Sparks flew between spider webs and bumps and Harry saw the two most important men in his life hurting each other.

 

He didn't stop them.

 

 Instead he leaned back in his favorite chair with a blanket over his body and pretended to sleep until finally doing it.

 

Peter appeared at his apartment door, in a dirty jacket and sweatpants, the slightest hint of a beard and reeking of cheap beer two weeks later. In his hand, a single vial full of blood and still crying.

 

Harry couldn't help but forgive him.

 

Max growled like a caged animal, Harry felt the friction of the static in the air, the hairs on the back of his neck prickled.

 

"Okay" He said "it's alright" He smiled briefly hugging him "I knew you wouldn't leave me to die Pete" he whispered in his ear.

 

Peter laughed against his neck, a bitter and tired sound. Harry flinched at the smell of stale alcohol.

 

"No" Peter whispered "Never"

 

Harry asked him to take a shower, Felicia walked into the room at the precise moment when Peter stepped out of the shower with a towel around his waist, she gave him a pair of trousers and an expensive-looking shirt, with an apathetic expression, nothing to give her true emotions.

 

From his place in the room Harry read the anger in her blue eyes.

 

"Did you enjoy your shower Mr. Parker?" She asked, Harry flinched at the venom in her voice.

 

Peter smiled innocently "Yes" he said "Harry's shower is amazing"

 

"Good to know" She smiled "Especially considering that Mr. Osborn has been unable to take a decent shower for a while" she said "Not with the drops of the shower cutting his skin like a knife" finished before leaving the room.

 

Peter's smile disappeared, Max observed Harry's reaction quietly. Harry giggled and assured his friend that Felicia should be having a bad day.

 

"We all have a bad day once in a while" he said "Even the woman with the best boss in the world can have a bad day right?" He smiled charmingly.

 

One of the bulbs in the room exploded. Max stormed off the room yelling something about Etienne visiting that night.

 

Peter smiled uncomfortably "So ... this guy Etienne. Is he your boyfriend?" he asked.

 

"I hardly know him" he said looking at Peter in the eyes "I couldn't afford to fall for someone knowing that I was going to die. Much less let someone else do it" he hissed "But for the record he doesn't have some kind of disease if that was what you were implying that night "

 

Harry saw the guilt dancing in the eyes of his friend.

 

"And Etienne was the only one who would never be disgusted by my body" he said, reveling in the pain of his friend "I think you should leave" he finished.

 

Peter left the apartment just like everyone else, Harry drank his coffee full of old scotch waiting for Etienne all afternoon.

 

_Later that night, for the first time, he let himself think about his partner instead of the guy for whom he had been fantasizing about for over 10 years._

**__ **

**_ Slow I suffocate  _ **  
I'm cold and broken   
Alone

**__ **

**__ **

Harry had gotten used to the loneliness at age 12 when, no matter how many friends he made at boarding or the constant presence of his roommate, the hole in his chest that his father had planted by sending him abroad and away from his best friend just didn't seem to close.

 

Harry forced himself to get used to loneliness at age 14 on the day of his birthday, when despite previous years the congratulatory letter that Peter would send religiously every year, just didn't come.

 

Harry turned loneliness in his companion at  age 17 the first time he woke up without a warm body next to him after making love.

 

But by all means an Osborn assumes loneliness as an ally and the acceptance of loneliness as a symbol of maturity.

 

Harry thanked meeting her later than the average boys in his condition.

 

The sources said that Tony Stark met solitude from the moment he was born.

 

Still years of solitude could not prepare him for the solitude before dying. Felicia wouldn't talk to him, not after admitting in his life so easily the man who made him cry for days in her lap. Max could not stand being in his presence more than three minutes without feeling the need to break something and hurt him in the process and Peter would be too embarrassed to even try to approach.

 

Loneliness was settled in his chest like a constant pain and numbness in each of his muscles. Alcoholism became his sedative and the toxins from the cigarette into the fire to burn inside when the cold came.

 

At plain sight the disease was killing him faster than anyone predicted, but if someone had taken a moment to really examine him.

 

They'd know that what was really killing him slowly.

 

It was actually loneliness.

 

Etienne saw it, he saw it the first time he focused his eyes on Harry Osborn's blue ones and he saw it that night entering the apartment of his lover.

 

Loneliness, like a corporeal lady dancing around a beautiful man, saw it the first night and every other that would follow. He saw her as a shield and a virus kepping a great guy away from real life experiences.

 

He saw it and decided to get rid of it.

 

Etienne met Felicia one night after making love with Harry, the boy sleeping in his arms and he admiring the features of the blond. Felicia was beautiful, obviously overprotective and Etienne immediately understood the reason behind the look of pure disdain in her eyes the night she gave him her phone number for Harry orders. .

 

Etienne met Max after the release of prisoners in Ravencroft, that night he entered the apartment to be greeted by a burst of energy hitting the wall inches from his face.

 

Etienne met Peter Parker in the same way that all men with an unrequired love met the reasons for their pain.

 

For the lips of his lover.

 

Like anyone else, to be the center of the universe of the beloved, should be one of the highlights in his life. The day you looked at yourself in the mirror and told to yourself "This is me, I don't why I came to this world. I don't know how I came to this world. But this is what I know. Right now, right here. I'm alive

 

Be the center of the universe of a broken man was nothing like that. And even on the days he loved himself enough to think "I can fix this man" "I am enough" He knew the truth.

 

Join three of the most important people for Harry Osborn was difficult, between horrible personalities and secrets that he wasn't meant know was an almost Herculean task, between superpowers and corporate geniuses, it was almost impossible.

 

But in the end, overprotection was stronger than stubbornness and love and friendship was stronger than anger and jealousy.

 

It was nevertheless an easy task.

 

Fact was that...

 

The hardest thing was realizing that from all these people, among all of them. The most important people for Harry Osborn. He wasn't one of them.

 

It was hard and it was painful and much of the time he felt the need to surrender.

 

But...

 

_But Harry didn't look lonely anymore, loneliness seemed to disappear gradually and among all those people. Harry Osborn seemed more alive than ever._

**_ I'm cold and broken _ **

**__ **

****

Weeks became months, months two years. They still couldn't find the cure. Day after day Peter seemed to want to burst into tears of impotence, day after day Felicia would take more work from him because he'd been becoming weaker and weaker and his memory would weaken with every passing day. Gwen would want to travel to the United States and he wouldn't allow it.

 

She would be great one day, but that wouldn't happen in the States.

 

Day after day, Max would be found closer to him. From a room next to his, to a chair beside his bed, from a possessive friend to a constant companion. Harry knew that no matter what happened, Max would be with him until the very last moment.

 

Etienne continued visiting him every night even after he did not have the strength for sex again.

 

He told him that he loved him.

 

Days became weeks and weeks became months. The disease ate everything that had once been Harry Osborn.

 

And...

 

A day after finally finding a positive sample in his research Peter broke down and wept all the tears he hadn't cried and broke all the vials he hadn't broken. Even though they got the cure it was too late.

 

Because...

 

Peter walked into Harry's room, too thin and still healthy. In the Spiderman costume even after promising himself not using it again. Without the mask to hide his identity he approached to the bed of his friend.

 

"I think I love you" he whispered sitting on the empty bed "I think I have loved you all my life and didn't want to see it for myself," he laughed "Leave it to Harry Osborn to prove it in the most dramatic way possible," He knew he was crying and just couldn't stop, "I was jealous of this European guy, that night. I was jealous" There was no response and he cried a little louder "Everyone seems to get on with their lives, Felicia is the best president you've seen. these days all she does is being scary but it works" he laughed "Max is working for Tony Stark now. I think in a year or two they'll manage to create self-sustaining amount of electric energy to feed all of New York" He sighed "Aunt May doesn't want to use your money but I think I'm finally persuading her" He assured to no one "Everyone is living their lives buddy" He kept crying. "I do not know what to do Harry. because I love you more than I've ever loved anyone and it just seems like everyone I love keep dying around me!" His response was silence and he hit a flower vase next to the bed "And I know it's my fault!" He shouted "Despite what everyone attempt to tell me I know it's my fault because if I hadn't waited two fucking years to find this cure, you'd be alive" he wept breaking the vial with a slightly fluorescent liquid on the floor.

 

"But I promise you this" he whispered with decision, "I will not allow people to keep dying" He smiled "Not if I can help it" "I'm Spiderman right?" He put on the mask "I promise you one day. One day Harry Osborn" He jumped from the window, the air hissing, marking the graceful movements of the superhero.

 

 

 

_"One day Spiderman will be a sign of hope"_

 

**Author's Note:**

> This probably needs a beta so if someone's interested my e-mail is Lamegu_teama_s.c@hotmail.com


End file.
